Tesla's Summoning Feature, Pharma Bro, Friends Day and More In The Weekly Spread!

Seems like we really are living like The Jetson’s now, with Tesla’s new Summon feature. No longer will you have to travel from doorstep to car, your Tesla Model S P85D will come right to you! The Summon feature, available from your key fob or phone (or even cooler, your Apple Watch) allows you to call your car right out of the driveway, unparking itself and obediently arriving right at your doorstep! Great news for us, but you have to wonder the toll this feature will take on lawns across America.

Here’s an update from our favorite guy to hate: Martin Shkreli, fraudulent pharma bro, made his appearance on Capitol Hill this past Thursday. You would think that by this point he might try to apologize, but Shkreli held true to his beloved persona and just smiled and yawned as he pleaded the fifth amendment to nearly all of the questions posed by the House of Representatives. After the hearing was cut short due to a frustratingly one-sided argument, Shkreli finally found his voice in tweeting for everyone to check out his “slick escape from photographers into [his] armored SUV. #smooth”.  Now can somebody please create a “loathe” emoji so that we can properly convey our feelings about this guy?

Facebook has invented a new holiday to commemorate their twelfth birthday. Similar to the “Year in Review” feature, a personalized “Friends Day” video has been appearing on user’s timeline’s, highlighting some special moments and good pals (according strictly to internet interactions, of course). The event quickly made it’s way through other social media platforms, with Twitter blowing up as people declared that Facebook clearly doesn’t know who their real best friends are, maybe just the people they most frequently Facebook stalk… awkward.

Everyone’s got the political buzz this week as the Iowa caucus results kick off the 2016 presidential election. With Ted Cruz coming in the lead for the Republican Party, and Hillary Clinton for the Democrats, predictions seem to have been fairly accurate. Despite some tense moments when Trump was ahead in many of the polls, Twitter’s pre-caucus data called the final results pretty realistic. Thankfully restoring our faith that no one is actually serious about electing the Trumpmeister.  

In other news, our dear old groundhog did indeed fail to see his shadow. Early spring for us! Seems only fair after the East Coast was pummeled by Winter Storm Jonas (Brothers - Ha! We made ourselves laugh), and some of us are still recovering from a week off of school and work.